Category Archives: psychological stuff

Why All the Links? & a Link — to an Article About Grocery Shopping, Safely

To read this regularly, you’d think I spend much of my time doing internet research, right? Wrong!

The motivation behind the advice links is that I know I should read them all and make informed choices. I should have a routine for dealing with groceries and mail coming in the house. I should be disinfecting every square inch of the house, the cars, the mailbox, etc.

But, like most SHOULDs, only some of it gets done. The piece which does happen usually doesn’t happen immediately.

The links and links lists are my bookmarks. It’s useful for me to have them all in one place. If others find them useful too? All the better!

One thing I learned after decades of dealing with amorphous, traumatic distress? Concrete and practical advice is almost always more helpful than platitudes and motivational speeches. An unempoloyed, depressed person will usually respond more positively to a revision of their resume than an hour’s worth of sympathy, although do give both.

The two most popular posts here are how to cook pink Madagascar rice and how to estimate linear feet of needed book shelving. I don’t think that’s an accident.

The post about cooking pink rice was written because I went looking for exactly that and couldn’t find it. I used a cookbook I own, guessed based on data there and it worked. That’s what’s in the post.

The how to estimate needed book shelving post was part of a series of bookselling “how to” posts I made on the late, lamented site

It helps that I used to write instructions for a living, yes. But that isn’t the only reason that those posts are my most popular. Both are simple, concrete and practical advice.

I found this article about how to shop for your groceries safely. Unfortunately for me, I found it after I got back from this week’s marketing. Next week!  link


What to Do?

I was going swimmingly along and then all of a sudden, I’m not. Why? Well, it’s the usual for me: I noticed/wrote about what was going on.

That was for decades the most frustrating thing about the way my head is wired between the abuse and PTSD: when I start to overcome the issues, if I acknowledge it, it stops. For a long time, the acknowledgement would trigger a panic attack: full blown. These days, I just stop making progress.

The maintenance jobs are getting done, not as quickly or consistently, but they are. I keep expecting, naively, apparently, that I will just move into a space where I can simply do things. That isn’t so. My body still has PTSD and my intellect isn’t the boss of me.

What isn’t getting done is progress on the culling and house clearing. Yes, I’m overwhelmed. Yes, it’s a huge task. Yes, I’ve been doing this for years decades. I have a few things goading me on.

  1. I don’t want to be remembered for being a hoarder. An ex-hoarder? That I can handle.
  2. If I/we get COVID, the stuff will make caretaking harder.
  3. If or when we have to move, the stuff will have to be dealt with then, and it’s harder every year to move the stuff around.
  4. I want out of this prison that the PTSD/abuse created for me, decades ago, to keep me safe. I have a friend who calls the house my fortress. It was. The funny thing about a locked room — it can keep you safe, but it also can be a jail!
  5. I’d like to find out what life is like otherwise. I’d like to see what I can accomplish when I don’t spend a huge amount of each day caretaking/dealing with stuff, and without the stuff in the way.

So, I went looking for inspiration/motivation, something. I started looking at my get organized books and found a piece which said that when all of a day’s jobs are  maintenance, you need to add an achievement task, because you need both.

Maintenance jobs are getting done. Achievement job? Hm. What could I do which won’t make more mess and can be completed . . .

  • Sweep the front walk.
  • Make up a gallon of sanitizer. (1/3C bleach to 1 gallon of water)
  • Get the rags/kitchen towels put away.

All of those are maintenance, again. Achievement goal?

If a maintenance goal is characterized by being continually repeated and an achievement goal being a one-shot . . ,

  • Finish the 2017 tracking for the farm which was started last week.
  • Work on the “house book.”
  • Work on the long-term planning.
  • Finish the touch-up on the entry baseboards.


I don’t remember where I got the image. But it illustrates a lot of my present mental state!